Monday, February 1, 2010


I felt so complete this past Saturday. I was so inspired by many people. I attend a women's conference sponsored by my church on Saturday. It was so inspiring and comforting to hear "You're not alone" when it comes to struggles. Our family is having some financial struggles, if you didn't know. It's very sad and hard to believe we're losing our home. We're also going to lose our car. We're going to downgrade to an older, used car. It will be for the best. Sometimes you have to take steps back before you can move forward. I am grateful for the inspiration given to me from the people at the conference. I am also grateful for the lessons I learned from the Yoga class and Krav Maga. Yoga reminded me how to breathe. My friend H. taught an hour lesson at the conference, and I got a great workout from it. I learned how to get out of another choke hold! Hopefully, I will never have to use it.

Saturday's Food
2 corn tortillas, 1 cheese square, 2 oz. lean roast beef
7 almonds
small Buca di Beppo salad, 1/2 cheese ravioli, 1/2 chicken canneloni (I didn't know how many calories or fat I was eating, so I just ate half.)
Weight Watchers recipe for linguine pasta with lowfat sauce
Workout:  1 hour Krav Maga, 30 minutes yoga

I probably didn't eat enough for Saturday, but I ate enough for Sunday.

Sunday's Food
2 corn tortillas, 1 cheese square, 2 oz. lean roast beef
14 almonds
2 corn tortillas, 1/6 cup cheese, 1 oz. lean chicken deli slice
7 almonds
1 cup tortellini and lowfat sauce
Workout:  day off :)

It's funny when one day you're as happy as can be and then the next day you're just plain annoyed and irritated. My husband irritated me today. I asked him how I was going to be able to walk into the house from our garage when he had two old DVD players on the floor and in my way (mind you, I was carrying Twin Boy @ 25 pounds and a large baby bag). He said, "Stop your complaing already. I've heard enough today." I was so hurt and upset at his words that I said nothing. What I thought about saying or what I should've said instead was, "Talk to me like I'm someone you love." I read that recently in a mag article. I think that would've set him off. For a while (longer than a few months) now, he has been talking to me in a certain tone or attitude. I notice that he has been trying to help me with the twins sometimes. I just get so upset with him because he doesn't do it enough. I'm ALWAYS the one who wakes up in all hours of the night with the babies. It's also expected of me (mostly from myself) to work out every day, clean the house, do the laundry, etc.Yes, he has a stressful job. Yes, he works 9-10 hours a day. I work 17 hours a day. My day doesn't end just because the twins went to bed at 8:00 p.m. That's when I do the laundry, dishes, and clean the house. That's when I do everything now, since I work out for 1 hour of the 1.5 hours-2 hours the twins nap during the day. The other half hour or hour when they're napping is when I make dinner. I don't sit around on the couch all day contrary to his beliefs. I'm sorry. I guess I needed to vent. I guess that's part of this blog. This is my weight loss journey. This journey has is successes and failures. My stressors are part of those successes and failures. I love my husband, but sometimes he drives me nuts.

This weekend we're going over to his parents' house- out of town, 6 hours of driving and probably 3 of those hours the twins will be screaming to get out of their carseats. I'm not looking foward to it. All his mother wants to talk about is his children (not ours together). I'm done with all that. I really don't care to hear the drama that my stepkids' mother is putting my mother-in-law through just because she can't see them whenever she wants. I have nothing to do with that. Leave me out of it. I've decided to take Dr. Laura Schlessinger's advice that she gives to many stepmothers:  Your husband is gonna do what he wants to do concerning HIS children. If you decide to control that, your marriage may be over. I decided that a long time ago, and the only time I give him my opinion is when it directly concerns or affects my twins. You may not agree with that, but you probably would sympathize with me if you knew what kinds of things my husband and I have edured in dealing with his ex-wife. I'm just glad that I didn't stuff my face with a whole cake after being upset.

Today, I'm planning on doing Jillian Michaels's "Trouble Zones" workout and 30 minutes of dancing.
Monday's Food
2 corn tortillas, 1 cheese square, 1 oz. lean roast beef
1/2 cup tortellini and lowfat sauce from yesterday's dinner
7 almonds
small portion of oriental beef stirfry and 1/3 cup white rice
1 WW piece of cake

Dr. Oz's Weight Loss Rule #2: Make Sister Food Substitutes

Learn to swap out your unhealthy staples with healthier sister foods. If you’re a pasta-lovin’ family, try creating your favorite dish with spaghetti squash instead.

I apologize for being so "down" in the end of this post. This is my HONEST blog about my journey. I hope you can respect that. Thank you for being a reader.

I hope you're having and happy and healthy day!

1 comment:

MissHaneefa said...

I think that you made the best decision to stay out of his kids business, you have to do what is best for you!