I weighed myself on Saturday, and I lost 1.5 pounds!
The past week has been a rollercoaster of emotions and physical strains on me.
I can't believe I ran over 12 miles this past week.
I'm so happy that I could just pass out.
Actually... there have been times when I feel like passing out and throwing up right after my runs.
This is a good thing, I think.
I must look crazy to those people who see me at the end of every run. I'm nearly in tears. It's not pain that I feel; instead, I feel joy.
I'm so thankful for every ounce of energy (to run and/or work out) that has been given to me every time I ask for it from above.
I used to (and still do for that matter) watch people run as I drove by them and think,
"Gosh... they're in really good shape. Look at them run. I wish I could run like them. They're so cool. They look so determined and strong."
I never thought about how difficult it may have been like for them to start running.
I never imagined that they could've been as big as I was when I started working out.
I've developed a new appreciation for those runners.
Can I call myself a "runner?"
My husband has been telling me that I am "athletic."
I feel funny hearing that.
I was pretty active as a teenager. Although I never participated in sports outside of P.E. (We couldn't afford paying for me to participate in sports.), I used to love to dance.
My friends and I would come up with our own dance routines and perform at dances and parties.
It was so much fun!
Can I really be called "athletic?"
Can I really be called a "runner?"
It would be nice to think of myself as something other than
"fat, tired, chubby, lazy, etc."
As of today, I am 13.5 pounds away from my goal weight.
As I lose this weight, I can't help but think that I'm still fat.
Yes, I know that I'm not skinny.
Yes, I know I've lost about 30 pounds, but I had this problem before.
I guess that's when you really realize that this "weight" problem isn't just a "weight" problem.
It's also a psychological problem.
I've been told by friends who have lost a lot of weight (50-100 pounds) that it takes a while for your brain to catch up with your body's changes.
The last time I lost about 45 pounds (about 7 years ago), it took me a while to "catch up."
I hope it doesn't take too long this time.
Today's Food and Activities
3 mile run
P90X abs (doing this every other day)
1 cup Kashi cereal, 1/2 cup 1% milk
1 english muffin, 2 oz. lean turkey, tomatoes, 2 TBS fat free cream cheese
ground turkey and 2 oz. whole wheat spaghetti with 1/2 cup low fat sauce
Have a happy and healthy day!